It’s Tiring Sometimes


Shadows, Cats, Paintings 039The last couple of weeks have been exhausting from a physical and emotional standpoint.  There is a lot going on and quite frankly, it drains one.  Sometimes there is no energy left for reasoning, analyzing, sorting, rationalizing, you name it, if it requires logical thought progression it can be a challenge.  Emotions, especially powerful ones like fear, despair, anger, frustration, can take away the ability to think things through clearly.  That’s kind of where we have been and are – it’s mostly the emotions of fear and despair that colour our world right now and so I have hesitated to write too much of anything.  Not because there’s nothing to write, just because what I would write about would reflect a fleeting state of mind and be based on feelings not on fact.

In the interim, we continue down the path of chemotherapy and have just finished the second treatment with Docetaxel.  So far so good, no major concern about nausea or vomiting so far – it’s only been about six hours though.  We continue to pump the fluids and I am staying ahead of the nausea by giving my hubby an anti-nausea medication on a regular four hour basis.  I will do this for today and again tomorrow and then we will reassess on Saturday.  It’s been a tough couple of days though.  He spent yesterday in Emergency for chest pains.  Luckily it wasn’t his heart, but unluckily it was the bone in his sternum – which he has already had radiated once for his bone cancer.  The sternum is too thin for any more treatment, but we will visit the radiologist next week to see what solutions she may come up with.  The last round of radiation was physically brutal as it was accompanied by significant pain, nausea and vomiting, however, in the long run it did work wonders in pain management after everything settled down.  If he elects to have more radiation, my husband will be well prepared for what he will experience.

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